Interviewer: How’s the crab?
Patrick: The crab is doing very nicely, a bit jealous.
Larry: Who me?
Patrick: No the crab. The other crab.
Larry: Oh, I thought he said ‘do you have the crabs?’
Interviewer: Well you’re looking well.
Patrick: Yeah for a man with crabs.
yes mom i know my room is a mess its a metaphor for my life im trying to be poetic
are we just going to ignore the fact that umbridge was gangraped by centaurs?
are we also going to ignore the fact that hermione was the one who lead her to them?
are we going to ignore the fact that if there’s one person in all of hogwarts who knows that centaurs are rapists, it’s hermione?
don’t fuck with hermione granger